Archive for vulnerability




What is your recipe for ‘gourmet sex’?


I am talking about the kind of sex that blows your mind.

The type of sex that changes your physiology, biochemistry, and entire mood….the hormones explode and everything feels more intense yet serene at the same time.

What ingredients create this type of sex?

Is it a hot lover?

Maybe – but what makes the lover hot?

Is it the lover’s appearance? No.

Is it the lover’s scent? Possibly. That is the primal part of attraction – raw and dirty.

Is our own state of mind an ingredient for hot sex?


The real factor that accounts for gourmet sex has to do with both partners.

Let’s call it receptivity. Vulnerability. Emotional openness.Being naked beyond the physical.

He lets his guard down. She lets him in. He allows her to see him beyond the surface. She feels safe to be authentic, from the inside out.

A study by a condom company (Durex) reported that 96% of men and women said that emotional connection with their partner is the most important factor in great sex.

This means that despite all of our attempts to Victoria Secret-ize our body, experiment with 50 Shades of Grey ideas, and present our body in particular ways, what makes sex hot is the presence of mutual vulnerability.